This essay is for anyone who is passionate about justice for children and women in the family court system who believes in reform. This essay should be able to persuade you using emotions and factual evidence to show that this is a pressing crisis that needs more attention from lawmakers. The main strengths of this essay are using real life case scenarios that have occurred in family court causing harm to children and protective parents who try to help them. This piece touches on issues with custody battles when an abusive parent is involved and how the court system exacerbates this issue. You will learn that often family court is complicit in putting children in harm and even causing fatalities that are avoidable. After reading this essay you will realize how the family court system is used as a weapon by abusive parents to further abuse children and protective parents who try to get justice and some of the ways we can make changes to fix it.

                  

                                                    

            Hundreds of children have been killed due to the failures of the Family Court in the United States. The Family Court is the only court that has no oversight board to make sure ethics are being followed. There have been several whistleblowers within the Family Court who have come forward regarding egregious corruption, especially regarding cases involving domestic violence and child abuse. Too many times, women and children alike have come forward to testify that they were in danger and a misogynistic Family Court judge made a poor judgement in their case that caused irreparable damage or worse- was fatal.

            The Family Court is also the only court that doesn’t appoint you an attorney if you cannot afford one unlike criminal or traffic court. Retainers for family court lawyers start at $2,000-$4,000 so if you are low on funds, you may be out of luck in fighting for child custody or protection for your child against the other parent. Another fault is many times when a protective parent reports abuse, they are the one who instead becomes ostracized from their child and is accused of being “hysterical” or “mentally unstable” for bringing the accusations to the court in the first place. According to USA Today, over 940 kids have been killed during custody battles. A lot of people within the family court are not knowledgeable about narcissistic abuse and the dangerous patterns this personality disorder presents in custody battles. Many lawyers are well versed and experienced in dealing with high conflict custody cases and divorces involving narcissistic parents, but the judges are nowhere near up to speed.

            I have a friend who many years ago when her sons were under the age of twelve, (which is the legal age a child can testify on their own behalf in court), her abusive ex-husband had convinced the courts she was mentally unstable and took full custody of her kids. He ended up grooming and sexually assaulting both children multiple times orally and anally for years. A medical examiner found anal fissures in the boys and a forensic psychologist evaluated them for very abnormal hypersexual behaviors that concluded they were in fact being sexually abused by their father. Child services, the forensic psychologist and the medical examiner all provided detailed reports with sufficient evidence to show that the children were sexually abused but the judge still ruled in favor of the father keeping custody. It wasn’t until the boys were old enough to testify for themselves that the judge finally removed them from the abusive father’s custody and placed them back with their mother. They are now in her full custody and are both teenagers, however the irreparable damage that has been caused cannot be undone and these boys will have to deal with this severe trauma for the rest of their lives.

            This brings me to the next important element that fails children yearly in the United States which is the incompetence and corruption of the Child Protective Services organization. According to a story done by CBS News on June 14, 2019, hundreds of children in America that were reported to be in potential danger to Child Protective Services die every year from neglect, maltreatment or abuse. In 2017 there was an estimated 1,720 children who reportedly died from abuse or neglect and over 25% of those children’s living situations were reported to Child Protective Services. I also have a friend who was a survivor of sex trafficking and the man who sex trafficked her was hired by ACS in New York City as a caseworker. This is a true story this was in 2023. He no longer holds the position but this is a real life example of the type of people that Child Protective Services hires to be caseworkers involving child abuse and neglect. Imagine a man who abused and sex trafficked women to be the final say on whether a child is in danger or being abused? You don’t have to imagine it because this is the reality. The lack of compassionate and competent case workers and social workers being hired by the agency is something that needs to be investigated more. Hiring guidelines surrounding any field involving children, especially something as sensitive as child abuse, needs to be a lot stricter than what is currently allowed. Not to mention the biases of many case workers such as sexism, racism and ableism that interfere with case workers being objective in their evaluations and assessments of children who are potentially in danger.

            There are several measures that can be taken to reduce cases such as these. A major issue is that many people fear reporting family court judges for misconduct to be disbarred due to fear of a poor ruling in their custody case. People will avoid reporting judges because they do not want the judge to retaliate maliciously in their custody hearing. This is due to a lack of oversight of the Family court and its mishandling of so many cases. Most courts and legal institutions in general all have an oversight board that can monitor and hold corruption accountable. Family court basically operates freely without there being any “HR department”, if you will. There is no oversight committee or oversight board separate from the Family court that you can report mistreatment or injustice to. Basically, if you report a judge for misconduct, you are reporting them to the exact family court that they serve at. Meaning it is not a separate unbiased organization responsible for investigating the judges, but it is the Family court itself whom this judge has been serving at for most likely decades and has an overwhelming bias in that court. How can the Family court investigate itself objectively and fairly without nepotism interfering? How can a proper investigation of mishandling custody cases be executed justly and fairly when it is that exact corrupted court doing the investigation? The corrupt court is obviously not going to give the most honest and fair investigation, which ultimately lets this corruption persist and continue to fail hundreds of children across the country.

            Another way these cases can be reduced is not only by having an oversight board to hold judges accountable but also to make sure judges are as educated about narcissistic abuse and patterns of abusive behavior as the forensic psychologists or medical examiners are. There needs to be more awareness in the family courts of coercive control, tactics that narcissistic abusers use in custody cases to further abuse the children and the other parent and having better insight into the patterns of narcissistic personalities so judges can have better discernment in these high conflict cases. Judges try to be impartial and make sure both parents are getting equal rights to their children. However, in cases where there is child abuse, or the child is in imminent harm, the rights of the parents need to be the last concern. The safety of the child and what is best for the child should always supersede parental rights. Many narcissistic abusers will weaponize their 50/50 custodial rights to continue to abuse the children. They manipulate judges with the argument of “fairness” and as a “parent” having equal access to the children also by manipulating the judge that they are the more “mentally stable” parent. This tends to work considering the parent who is a victim of the abuse is experiencing PTSD or symptoms of trauma and may very well appear less stable or emotionally well compared to the cool collected charming narcissist. However, with more knowledge into the ways abusers use the Family court to maintain control over the children, judges, social workers and forensic psychologists can work together to make sure the safety of the child/children is being prioritized over the parents’ rights to their children. Children are not property; they are vulnerable human beings who lack rights over their own autonomy in custody battles where they aren’t even legally able to testify on their own behalf until twelve years old. Under twelve they are considered the property of the parents and parental rights become more prioritized than the child’s right to safety and autonomy. If we reduce the importance of parental rights and focus more on the potential signs of abuse/ harm, coercive controlling behaviors and domestic violence, then abusive parents will be less likely to weaponize their parental rights in family court. There are many ways we can improve the family court so abusers cannot continue to use the system to harm children. With all of this being said, there is a silent crisis occurring in custody hearings in the United States that requires lawmakers’ immediate attention towards reform. The safety, lives and well-being of too many children depends on it.